I just turned 28 recently and have developed a rather distant attitude towards turning a year older. It's just another number and nothing really has changed, has it? My thoughts are still repeating the same patterns and my emotions and opinions on a lot matters remains thin and sometimes too familiar. I am not surprised. But the more I think about getting older and where I've been, what I've done and what I've achieved, I understood slowly that perhaps my life or this life is just merely starting to form itself into something more. I like to believe that each year, each day I grow a little bit older, I've lived a tiny bit more and in that presence, I've touched the lives of others, have found pieces of joy and laughter and took my time to breathe. To keep myself wandering and pondering, I have set myself a list of things I would like to achieve and do and here they are:
1. I would like to keep writing, to explore my words, expose their simplicity and hopefully add more depth. This is both for my personal and professional development. I want to tug and pull at the words I choose and the thoughts that come along with it.
2. I want to seriously get back or be involved in theatre once again. I have missed it and neglected it for far too long. I long for days of rigourous exploration of the creative soul.
3. Speak fluent Mandarin. Having started this rather long term project, I am giving myself until the mid of 2010 to be able to speak fluent-enough-Mandarin. I am not talking about being able to write or read fluently but to speak well enough to carry a decent conversation that goes beyond the weather and ordering food in a restaurant.
4. I would like to use time to seriously consider and explore the idea of pursuing a PhD broadly in areas relating to either communications or theatre and its relations/implications on the community and societal decision making process (a very broad broad idea!). I have no idea exactly what the intellectual puzzle of such a research would be but I would like to explore in depth. I might use this space to tinkle about with some ideas.
5. Share my thoughts more with others. This is more personal for me. I learned I need to share more with my loved ones and people I care about. That it's okay to feel vulnerable and trust others to let them come in and hold you when things are difficult.
